The Blame Game

Admit it, we've all know "that" person. Maybe you've know more than one. I'm guessing if you're over twenty years old, you have known quite a few.

They are the people who make excuses for their poor behavior because of a bad childhood, the death of a loved one or some other life changing trauma. Their whole life "sucks" because of the past and though most of them don't even know it, the negative energy they cast engulfs everyone in their wake. 

You cannot however allow anyone to excuse their bad behavior on the past. I've known far too many people who use this as a crutch for the way they act and things they do. I call them "Schleprocks," after a character on the "Flintstones" who was always miserable with a dark cloud hanging over his head.

Nothing is ever their fault and they refuse to take responsibility for their actions or the poor choices they've made. They blame it on the bad economy that's caused them go from job to job. It could be that Daddy didn't love them so they're angry at the entire world. Maybe it was just the cops out to get them after they were texting and driving and got a ticket. With this type of person, it's never ever their fault. 

Let's face it though, everyone has made a bad decision or two in their life. I can look back and point to quite a few of my own that turned my life in a less than positive direction. The key to a better more productive life however is being able to move past those bad decisions and stop blaming your luck, your parents, your boss, etc. for your problems. You made the decision, so own it and stop blaming the rest of the world.

The vast majority of people I've known who practice the blame game are the energy vampires I talked about in a previous post; they'll suck the life right out of you if you allow it. In many ways, they are narcissists because life is all about them and their problems. They don't consider or don't care how it negatively affects those around them.

Consider the opposite; those people who just exude a positive energy. I've known women who may not have been the prettiest, but their energy made them very attractive and a joy to be around. That positive attitude can be a key to a successful and happy life. 

As we grow as a person, we should learn from our past, but don't let it control our actions or our future. I'll never whine about what I consider to have been a dysfunctional childhood. There were things that happened that could have turned me into a Schleprock, but I overcame and did something positive with my life.  If I hadn't, I would have had no one to blame but myself.

Most people I know can say the same, but unfortunately not all. Don't let those practicing the blame game drag you down into their personal drama. Most of them I know love sharing their misery with others. Remember though, whether they're family, friends or coworkers, you owe them nothing.

We can be supportive but when you feel yourself beginning to get stuck in their mire, extract yourself from the situation without guilt. You'll find it's a much better and healthier way to live.